Amazing insights and epiphanies from the mouth of LuxTumblr (3.0; @luxisms)http://luxisms.tumblr.com/<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m1z26b2eP41r81a8go1_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m1z26b2eP41r81a8go2_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/><img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m1z26b2eP41r81a8go3_500.jpg"/><br/> <br/>http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/20482104839http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/20482104839Wed, 04 Apr 2012 16:27:47 -0400Lux: hey<br /> Me: anal sex<br /> Me: fat pussy lips<br /> Lux: what<br /> Me: vaginal discharge<br /> Me: chlamydia<br /> Me: the clap<br /> Lux: im trying to have a serious conversation here!<br /> Me: hairy poonanny<br /> Lux: CONSERVE HAIR<br /> Me: distended clitoral … things<br /> Me: WHAT<br /> Lux: main cabin select<br /> Me: DO YOU WANT LUX<br /> Lux: THATS WHAT SHE SAID<br /> Lux: SHE WANTS MAIN CABIN SELECT<br /> Lux: EXTRA HEADROOM<br /> Lux: OH WAIT<br /> Lux: IM AT THE AIRPORT<br /> Lux: BORED<br /> Me: NICE<br /> http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/20059348424http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/20059348424Wed, 28 Mar 2012 08:00:05 -0400Lux: I JUST FELL ASLEEP<br /> Lux: WHILE TAKING A SHIT<br /> Lux: BEAT THAT<br /> Me: uhhhh<br /> Lux: I WOKE UP BECAUSE MY ELBOW SLIPPED AND MY FOREHEAD SLAMMED AGAINST THE GROUND<br /> Lux: TRUE STORY<br /> Me: ..<br /> Me: where are you<br /> Lux: AT HOME<br /> Me: oh ok god<br /> Me: i thought you were still here at the office<br /> Lux: YOU THOUGHT I WAS MESSAGING YOU FROM THE OFFICE TOILET?<br /> Me: yeshttp://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/20045383642http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/20045383642Tue, 27 Mar 2012 22:55:17 -0400Lux: THE WORLD IS A MAGICAL PLACE<br /> Lux: WE SHOULD ALL BE THANKFUL<br /> Me: wtf<br /> Lux: I FOUND JESUS<br /> Me: great<br /> Lux: HE WAS A HOMELESS MAN LYING ON THE CORNER OF 4TH & TOWNSEND<br /> Lux: I REFUSED TO GIVE HIM CHANGE<br /> Lux: HE THREW A SPOON AT ME THAT ALMOST HIT MY HEAD<br /> Me: hahahaha<br /> Me: why do you think he's jesus<br /> Lux: HE KEPT YELLING<br /> Lux: "I AM THE RESURRECTION"<br /> Lux: AT ALL THE WALGREENS CUSTOMERS<br /> Lux: LESSON LEARNED<br /> Lux: DONT FUCK WITH GODhttp://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/15677807688http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/15677807688Wed, 11 Jan 2012 13:25:25 -0500Lux: holy shit i slept about 17 hours<br /> Me: nice<br /> Lux: WHERE AM I<br /> Me: in space<br /> Lux: IM STANDING ON URANUS<br /> Me: great. this again.<br /> Lux: A GAS GIANThttp://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/15677732258http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/15677732258Wed, 11 Jan 2012 13:23:13 -0500FUCKING A I WANT TO BIT INTO A BIG<br /> MAC<br /> MOST REAL LIFE OBJECTS NOW LOOK LIKE CUTS OF MEAT TO ME NOWhttp://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/15318631282http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/15318631282Wed, 04 Jan 2012 19:42:53 -0500Lux: WHEN THEY ARE IN ACTUALITY HAVING SEX WITH DUDES WITH ALMOST NO OBSERVABLE PENILE MATERIALS<br /> DOESNT MAKE ANY SENSE<br /> BREAD GOES IN<br /> TOAST COMES OUT<br /> <br /> Me: ...<br /> WORDS OF WISDOM<br /> <br /> Lux: SANDWICH SULTAN<br /> <br /> Me: WHAT<br /> <br /> Lux: <a link to the sandwich sultan><br /> BREAD GOES IN<br /> SANDWICHES COME OUT<br /> OH SNAP<br /> NOW THE HUNTED BECOMES THE HUNTER<br /> THE STUDENT BECOMES THE MASTER<br /> THE SLAVE BECOMES THE GLADIATOR<br /> <br /> Me: hahaha whoooah<br /> <br /> Lux: THE USURPER BECOMES THE USERPEE<br /> <br /> Me: that thing is awesome<br /> <br /> Lux: THE SERVANT BECOMES THE SULTAN<br /> THE PREDATOR BECOMES THE PREY<br /> DARKEST BEFORE DAWN<br /> 6.115 PROJECT<br /> I GOT A B ON IT<br /> FUCKERS<br /> <br /> Me: FUCK EM<br /> DENY THEM SAMMICHES<br /> <br /> Lux: THEY GET NONE<br /> ALL THEY GET<br /> IS GENGHIS KHAN SPERM<br /> 10% OF WORLD POPULATION WHAT<br /> <br /> Me: ...<br /> oh god there's a puppycam<br /> http://www.sfspca.org/support/events/macys-holiday-windows-s2<br /> <br /> Lux: YEAH I GOT FUCKED<br /> <br /> Me: WHAT<br /> http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/14897933987http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/14897933987Tue, 27 Dec 2011 22:35:11 -0500Lux: https://www.google.com/search?q=gulab+jamun&um=1&ie=UTF-8&hl=en&tbm=isch&source=og&sa=N&tab=wi&ei=m4z6Tp6NPKnZiQL65tk5&biw=1590&bih=1342&sei=wYz6TqzyGZLWiAL7tI2MDQ<br /> <br /> me: yes delicious good job<br /> <br /> Lux: THATS A LOT OF BALLS<br /> <br /> me: sticky ones<br /> <br /> Lux: BUT THEY CONTAIN MILK<br /> WHICH IS IRONIC<br /> BECAUSE NORMALLY MILK IS SUPPOSED TO COME FROM BOOBS<br /> AND BALLS HAVE A DIFFERENT WHITE LIQUID INSTEAD<br /> IRONIC<br /> <br /> Me: great<br /> <br /> Lux: ALANIS MORISETTEhttp://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/14897719093http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/14897719093Tue, 27 Dec 2011 22:30:59 -0500Lux: http://www.lolsaywhat.com/tag.php?t=tapeworm<br /> 2:27<br /> me: NO LUXhttp://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/14231969892http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/14231969892Wed, 14 Dec 2011 17:28:07 -0500<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lw42w8eJQP1r81a8go1_500.png"/><br/><br/>http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/14133248599http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/14133248599Mon, 12 Dec 2011 17:09:44 -0500<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lw42vkoUzH1r81a8go1_500.png"/><br/><br/>http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/14133226064http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/14133226064Mon, 12 Dec 2011 17:09:19 -0500<img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lw42u4a1RL1r81a8go1_500.png"/><br/><br/>http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/14133181673http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/14133181673Mon, 12 Dec 2011 17:08:27 -0500Luxiou: CATNIP LUX<br /> <br /> I HAVE A VAGINA<br /> <br /> INSIDE OF MY THROAT<br /> <br /> THAT IS MY MAIN SECRET<br /> 1:07 PM<br /> me: GREAThttp://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/13980555155http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/13980555155Fri, 09 Dec 2011 16:05:12 -0500me: THIS SONG<br /> SOUNDS LIKE YOUR FAKE THAI<br /> http://rd.io/x/QVUvajcBoeA<br /> <br /> 50 minutes later<br /> 3:02 PM Luxiou: YEAH<br /> SOUNDS LIKE A CASE OF<br /> DISTORTED LABIAhttp://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/13980504708http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/13980504708Fri, 09 Dec 2011 16:04:00 -0500Luxiou: IT GETS SO LONELY WHEN PAUL IS SLEEPING<br /> <br /> NO WIFE<br /> <br /> NO KIDS<br /> <br /> me: SAD<br /> <br /> Luxiou: NO CAT<br /> <br /> WAAAAAAAAH<br /> <br /> me: yeah come byhttp://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/13980476862http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/13980476862Fri, 09 Dec 2011 16:03:20 -0500Luxiou: HEY THE DOMAIN<br /> EDMONDISGAY.COM<br /> IS AVAILABLE<br /> <br /> Luxiou: JACKPOT<br /> TESTICLEHAVEN.COM<br /> !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!<br /> <br /> ALSO<br /> ASSCHEMICALS.COM<br /> !!!!!!!!!http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/13936683334http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/13936683334Thu, 08 Dec 2011 17:09:35 -05007:01 PM<br /> Luxiou: WHAT<br /> 7:02 PM<br /> WHERE ARE YOU<br /> <br /> OH MY GOD<br /> <br /> I KNOW WHERE YOU ARE<br /> <br /> YOU GOT HIT WITH A SHRINK RAY<br /> <br /> AND NOW YOU ARE INSIDE AAAAAA'S VAGINA<br /> <br /> EWWWWW<br /> <br /> GOD JUNY<br /> <br /> JUST HANG ON<br /> <br /> WE ARE COMING TO RESCUE YOU<br /> <br /> Luxiou: EXIT THE VAGINA WITH DIGNITY<br /> 7:24 PM<br /> me: I WILL TRYhttp://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/13936065232http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/13936065232Thu, 08 Dec 2011 16:56:35 -0500Luxiou: WHATEVER<br /> 10:54 AM<br /> HERE'S A PILE OF CATS http://imgur.com/DrRNP<br /> http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/13936079164http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/13936079164Thu, 08 Dec 2011 16:56:00 -0500Luxiou: APPARENTLY I SPENT SOME NON TRIVIAL AMOUNT OF TIME HUGGING A LAMPPOSThttp://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/13935964653http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/13935964653Thu, 08 Dec 2011 16:54:28 -0500me: FUCK IT. I'M BUYING A SNUGGIE<br /> 6 minutes later<br /> Luxiou: WOW BRO<br /> <br /> I HAD ALMOST THE EXACT SAME CONVERSATION WITH MYSELF RECENTLY<br /> <br /> me: HOW ALMOST EXACT<br /> <br /> Luxiou: I WAS SITTING ON THE COUCH IN MY BOXERS PLAYING SKYRIM<br /> AND THOUGHT<br /> <br /> DAMN, IT'D BE NICE TO HAVE A SNUGGIE RIGHT NOW<br /> <br /> me: YEAH<br /> <br /> Luxiou: ALSO<br /> ATTITUDE IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN FACTS<br /> SAYS MY FORTUNE COOKIEhttp://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/13935718360http://luxisms.tumblr.com/post/13935718360Thu, 08 Dec 2011 16:49:15 -0500